Today is Purim, the Jewish holiday that commemorates the foiling of Haman’s plot to annihilate the Jews of Ancient Persia. It is a joyful, boisterous holiday, with people dressing up in costume and lots of eating and revelry. As with all Jewish holidays, the festivities begin at sundown the night before. Last night Kendall, Leah, and I attended the Purim celebration at our synagogue, BCC, which happens to be the oldest gay and lesbian temple in the world. Our rabbi, Lisa Edwards, was dressed up as a dead-on Edward Scissorhands, and her costume was so realistic that some of the younger children in the congregation burst into tears at the sight of her. Leah went as a gypsy girl and reminded me of red-haired Maureen O’Hara’s character in “The Hunchback of Notre Dame.” As she ran around the shul with the other kids, she kept peeling off layers of her colorful scarves until she resembled Salome doing her Dance of the Seven Veils. I came as a Rastafarian, complete with long dreadlocks but minus the ganja.
The main activity at a Purim service is the reading of the Megillah which tells the story of the holiday as recounted in the Book of Esther. The Megillah reveals how King Ahashveros of Persia (also known as Xerxes I), after dumping his uppity wife Vashti, chose a beautiful new queen named Esther, unaware that she was Jewish. His evil prime minister, a wealthy and corrupt man named Haman, was insulted when Esther’s cousin Mordecai would not bow down to him. He convinced the king to kill all of the Jews in Persia but Esther and Mordecai manage to reverse their people's fortunes and send Haman to the gallows instead. At BCC, each chapter of the Megillah is read by a congregant in a different language. We had everything from Arabic, French, Italian, and German to Mandarin, Ugandan, American Sign Language, Pig Latin, and even Klingon! A fun time was had by all and, following tradition, each time the name Haman was uttered, everyone in the synagogue would shout “Boo!” and use their noisemakers to curse his soul.
I’ve felt a similar compulsion this weekend every time I’ve heard Ann Coulter’s name mentioned. On Friday, at the Conservative Political Action Conference in Washington, Coulter was introduced by Republican Milt Romney, former Governor of Massachusetts, who has recently thrown his hat into the presidential ring. Coulter reviewed the current candidates, pronounced Romney the best choice for president, and then concluded with this pearl:
“I was going to have a few comments on the other Democratic presidential candidate, John Edwards, but it turns out you have to go into rehab if you use the word ‘faggot,’ so I’m kind of at an impasse, I can’t really talk about Edwards.”
You can watch it for yourself if you can stomach it:
Did you catch that smirk? Ann Coulter reminds me of those privileged but mean sorority girls who take pleasure in tormenting pledges who come from different backgrounds or aren’t pretty or popular or blond enough. Coulter hides behind a “hey, I’m just kidding!” façade but she is neither witty nor funny, just a bully in the playground whose main philosophy in life seems to be “the squeaky wheel gets the grease.” Her reference to rehab is about actor Isaiah Washington’s recent stint after news broke of him using the new “F-word” on the set of “Grey’s Anatomy” to refer to another actor on the show who subsequently came out as gay. Yet compared to Coulter, Washington seems about as homophobic as Harvey Fierstein.
Now Romney is trying to distance himself from the mini-dress wearing commentator. I don’t buy any of the conservative pundits’ shock over Coulter’s latest episode. Minutes before her remark, Governor Romney was praising Ann Coulter to the skies. It’s not like this is Coulter’s first foray into the gutter. She caused a national furor last year when she criticized the families who lost loved ones on 9/11. In her book “Godless: The Church of Liberalism,” published in June 2006, she spewed:
“These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities and stalked by grief-arazzis... These self-obsessed women seemed genuinely unaware that 9/11 was an attack on our nation and acted as if the terrorist attacks happened only to them... I’ve never seen people enjoying their husbands’ deaths so much.”
Hideous. Coulter clearly loves her gig as national provocateuse and seems to get off on saying the most vile things she can think of. Many of her defenders say that they admire her because she says what “everybody else is thinking but afraid to say.” Really? It actually never occurred to me to cruelly taunt the widows of 9/11 or, as she did during a question-and-answer session following a speech at Indiana University last year, to call a student who disagreed with her “gay boy.”
Coulter seems to especially delight in demonstrating her gift of gaydar. In the past she has declared that Bill Clinton probably had latent homosexual tendencies but that Al Gore was “a total fag.” And now Edwards is a “faggot.” I admit that I am shocked to hear these words come out of anyone’s mouth today, especially when speaking in front of an allegedly serious political forum. Ann Coulter is consistently paid big bucks to speak at these events even though many conservatives claim she is an embarrassment and not taken seriously. But Friday’s outburst at CPAC was nothing new. I hate to repeat her invective but here is a small sampling of Coulter’s greatest hits on other subjects:
On Democrats:
“The Democrats are giving aid and comfort to the enemy for no purpose other than giving aid and comfort to the enemy. There is no plausible explanation for the Democrats’ behavior other than that they long to see U.S. troops shot, humiliated, and driven from the field of battle. They fill the airwaves with treason, but when called to vote on withdrawing troops, disavow their own public statements. These people are not only traitors, they are gutless traitors.” (column by Ann Coulter, November 23, 2005)On Environmentalism:
“God gave us the earth. We have dominion over the plants, the animals, the trees. God said, ‘Earth is yours. Take it. Rape it. It's yours.’” (appearance on Fox News, June 20, 2001)On Islam:
“We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity.” (speech by Ann Coulter, September 12, 2001)On Liberals:
Fox TV News Host: “You say you’d rather not talk to liberals?”
Ann Coulter: “I think a baseball bat is the most effective way these days.”On The New York Times:
“My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is that he did not go to the New York Times Building.” (August 26, 2002)
When asked the following year whether she regretted making that remark, she said:
“Of course I regret it. I should have added ‘after everyone had left the building except the editors and the reporters.’”On Women:
“I think women should be armed but should not vote...women have no capacity to understand how money is earned. They have a lot of ideas on how to spend it...it's always more money on education, more money on child care, more money on day care.” (on Comedy Central’s “Politically Incorrect,” February 26, 2001)
Ugh, I can’t take any more, can you? I love how whenever Coulter’s statements are criticized, her admirers start screaming about her First Amendment rights. Um, excuse me, but no one is suggesting that Ann Coulter be placed in a concentration camp for her idiotic views. She has every right to espouse them but the First Amendment works both ways. She can sling her hateful rhetoric, and people who take issue with it can openly condemn her comments. Oh, and by the way, here’s what Coulter said on the subject during a speech at the University of Florida in 2005:
“They’re [Democrats] always accusing us of repressing their speech. I say let’s do it. Let’s repress them. Frankly, I’m not a big fan of the First Amendment.”
She regularly calls Muslims “ragheads,” advocates for violence against people with whom she disagrees, and foams at the mouth any time Bill Clinton’s name is brought up. A former lawyer, Coulter was on Paula Jones’ legal team, her springboard to national prominence and a series of best-selling books.
If Coulter were transported back to Ancient Persia, I’ve no doubt she’d call Queen Esther a traitor to her king and country, imply that Mordecai was just a purple-robe wearing fag, and proclaim Haman to be a hero and patriot. I’m not accusing Coulter of masterminding any murderous plots, but she certainly has antagonized American Jews on more than one occasion by saying how gullible and stupid they are to accept the pandering of Democratic politicians who trump up fake Jewish ancestors to nail the Jew vote.
And what’s with the Edwards comment, anyway? Is she actually saying that she thinks John Edwards is a homosexual? Apparently, if that were the case (and it sure doesn’t seem to be), Coulter believes that a gay presidential candidate would be a horrific thing. Or is she just making some kind of statement about what she perceives as Edwards’ effeminate traits? Oh, that will never do, we’ve got to have a “real man” in that office, right, Ann? Let’s see, who can we ask? Is Genghis Kahn available by any chance? Oh wait, that wouldn’t work, he’s just a stupid gook. Maybe former Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet has the goods? Oh, sorry, Ann, that spic wouldn’t do either, it’s got to be a real American he-man like your draft-dodging hero, George W. Bush.
I feel sick to my stomach but I can’t tell if it’s because of Ann Coulter or the two poppyseed hamantaschen I just wolfed down.
Coulter claims to be a devout Christian and believes that she is a crusader defending the Christian values she holds so dear. Yes, and I believe that I am the lovely Esther, Queen of Persia.
I can't even watch or listen to her. When she talks about women that way, it makes you wonder if she understands that she is one.
She's kind of the Howard Stern of conservative politics, and just as annoying and ridiculous.
Posted by: churlita | March 04, 2007 at 10:33 PM
I can't figure out how she gets away with this garbage. Surely some on the right are having trouble stomaching her by now. I wonder what it will take for one of her own to finally denounce her? Or will she one day be led off in a straight jacket, still babbling about her long list of people she hates?
Thanks for exposing her latest madness.
Posted by: Elaine Soloway | March 05, 2007 at 02:48 AM
OK, now I want to lock her in a room with Perez Hilton and see who emerges alive.
I was going to say she had that intellect, maturity, and language skills of a seventh grader but I didn't want to insult all the seventh graders out there who put her to shame.
Posted by: V-Grrrl | March 05, 2007 at 03:23 AM
I adore the comparison! Ooh, she makes the hairs rise on the back of my neck.
I think I remember something about Purim and you and Kendall and me, no?
Plus, I have been wondering when Purim is!! I used to love it back in my Israel days. I love the idea of drinking so much that we get the names of the good and bad guys mixed up ... as a mizvah, I mean.
Looks like we have the bad guys all tied together here, though. Let's bag 'em up and chuck them out! Then there could be dancing in the streets and without our masks!
Posted by: tamarika | March 05, 2007 at 05:04 AM
Danny, I am going to have to ask my beloved friend Rachel to make some coultertaschen for next Purim, (though I am not sure I'd still have an appetite after thinking about Bigotty Ann); Rachel brought us some delicious vegan kiwi & boysenberry hamantaschen for dessert on Friday night. Your synagogue sounds like a wonderful place; if only everyone had a place to gather and share beliefs that was so tolerant and so much FUN!
Posted by: Heather | March 05, 2007 at 06:49 AM
Danny:
Coulter sickens and disgusts me. I've expressed my revulsion on my blog several times over the years, including my reaction to her recent comments about Edwards.
Once, I called her schtick so gruesome, you find yourself unable to resist casting an eye her way when she has one of these outbreaks. Sort of like how we respond to the three-car crackup you pass on an Interstate.
Why didn't the CPAC people disavow her on the spot?
Why didn't somebody say, "Sorry, Ms. Coulter, your Q-and-A has been canceled and your transportation to the nearest sewage treatment facility has been arranged"?
Why was she invited to speak there in the first place?
And why, given her track record for hateful invective, did Mitt Romney agree to introduce her?
In spite of what was, at the least, a horrific lack of judgment on Romney's part when it came to associating himself with Coulter, the group apparently picked the former Massachusetts governor as their first choice for President. (And calling his decision "a horrific lack of judgment" is putting it most charitably.) What is up with that?
A few weeks ago, my son, who works at a Starbucks and happens to be heterosexual, incurred the anger of some teenage boys because he couldn't comply with their request for a free refill on one of their fancy drinks. They began speaking in stage whispers about Phil, calling him the f-word.
His manager looked at these children of privilege--the Starbucks where my son works is in the wealthiest part of Cincinnati, some miles from where we live--and said, "This is my friend. You're invited to leave."
When my son and I talked about it later, he told me, "The thing is, Dad, John [not the real name of a co-worker with whom Phil was also working that night] really is gay. I cringed when these guys said this. But I was glad that John hadn't been the one who'd to refuse their request."
We agreed that no matter what one's beliefs about homosexuality, the term those kids (and Coulter) used is no better than the n-word. It's reprehensibly dehumanizing.
If there is any authenticity to the evangelical Christian view that all of us are sinners redeemed by a gracious God, then humility alone should prevent someone like Coulter, who claims to be Christian, from spewing such garbage. Or at least to apologize.
For a Christian like myself who, as you know, Danny, adheres to a more traditional view of sexuality, Coulter's comments about Edwards are doubly disturbing. That's because for the general public, not only has she defamed homosexuals and John Edwards, she's also defamed me and millions of other evangelical Christians who want to love all of our fellow sinners into a relationship with Christ. She's fed a stereotype of Christians as nasty and judgmental to a public increasingly unaware of what Christian faith really is. It ticks me off!
What outrages me almost as much as the substance of Coulter's verbal explosions is that every time we have another one of these eruptions from her, people like you and me, even from our diverse perspectives, feel the need to attend to what she's said. That is what she's aiming for, of course. But maybe if groups like CPAC or cable news networks wouldn't amplify her bile, we wouldn't have to try to clean up the messes she always leaves behind.
God bless you, Danny.
Mark Daniels
Posted by: Mark Daniels | March 05, 2007 at 07:19 AM
Hi, Danny --
You're right on in your assessment of that shrill, skeletal scold, Ann Coulter. But, that isn't why I've taken computer to hand. I'm doing so to thank you for broadening my intellectual/cultural horizons.
First, until I read today's blog, I had no idea that Good King Ahasuerus was Xerxes I of Thermopylae fame. Thanks for that. It should make for a good nugget of dinner-table conversation.
Second, until you identified BCC in Los Angeles as the world's first GLT Synagogue, I had thought that distinction belonged to Beth Simchat Torah in New York which has been operating at least since the early 1970s. In fact, I was ready to challenge you, but a quick google check revealed Beth Simchat Torah is "second oldest."
I have been humbled.
Bob C.
Posted by: Bob C. | March 05, 2007 at 10:27 AM
Along the lines of"the terrible things that happen when neocons try to be funny" I was flipping through the channels last night and came across a show on the Fox Propaganda Network called "The Half Hour News Hour." I watched in horror as FN aired a show that, I suppose, is an answer to Comedy Central's "The Daily Show." Anyway, it was a mock news show and so embarrassingly bad that I could only watch in horror for a couple of minutes before I came to my senses enough to flip the channel. But what I saw said it all. The jokes were indicative of what happens when mean spirited people attempt humor--deeper insight into their cowardly (homophobic) meannness.
Posted by: Ian | March 05, 2007 at 01:24 PM
Listening to Randi Rhodes on AIR AMERICA this afternoon, she brought up the idea that perhaps Anne is a man: check out her adams apple...and he/she is really attracted to john edwards.
Posted by: Judy | March 05, 2007 at 07:28 PM
Only YOU could come up with such a great comparison! Every so often, I torture myself by deciding to read what "the enemy" has to say. I only made to about page four of one of Coulter's books. Your description of her as one of those bullying sorority girls is so dead-on.
Posted by: Emily | March 06, 2007 at 05:39 AM
Danny: Great post as usual.
Although I find Coulter's humor just a tad too Hitlerian for my tastes, I am not shocked by her, and I beg everyone else not to be.
Shock is what puts bread on her table. She may have begun with a principle or an idea in mind -- say, a reaction against liberalism and especially the censorship of the politically correct -- but now she's just feeding the beast within her that wants to stay famous and get more famous. Even infamy is desirable if all you want is more and more attention. And shock garners attention.
It's just not worth it, although I'll add one caveat to that: if she's not just Andrew Dice Clay in drag; if she's not just giving voice to ugliness but actually nourishing a national ugliness that will rise due to her efforts; then she should be hounded out of town.
One last thing, and I hope you'll forgive me for this, but if you do search on "Ann Coulter" and certain cruder terms for anal sex, you'll come up with a viciously funny but very pornographic blog that turns her ugliness back on her in a most amazing way.
Not that I endorse that.
Posted by: david | March 06, 2007 at 12:12 PM
You did wonderfully in this post to talk so fairly about such an outrageous and narrow-minded woman. You and your delightful mentschlekhkeit...
That said, she makes even my eyelashes hurt with her outrageousness. Oy.
Posted by: Amy Guth | March 06, 2007 at 01:29 PM
Oh that Coulter is a hideous thing. On the other hand, we keep giving her the attention she craves, especially important (or those who'd like to be so)conservatives. Sad. Excellent article - better than most of the anti-Coulter articles out there because, here, we got to read about truly important things, such as the BCC and Purim and your celebration.
Posted by: Adriana Bliss | March 06, 2007 at 04:48 PM
Ann Coulter is an abomination...A Scary one, to be sure, but an Abomination none the less. I'm sick to my stomach too, but not from anything I ate!
Posted by: OldOldLady Of The Hills | March 07, 2007 at 01:09 AM
Ugh, I so wish I had something important to say about this, but I just don't. My mind get's all warped when I try to think of what possesses her to say such things. And then, I realize that maybe I've had it all along.
Possession.
Thanks for the great insight, as always.
And if I were to stoop to her level, I guess I would have to ask the only question I have ever wondered; "Ann, why the long face?"
Posted by: Dave | March 07, 2007 at 08:42 PM
I hope Ann gets hemorrhoids and herpes at the same time. I don't think Jesus likes the things that come out of her mouth, although I really can't speak for him.
Posted by: Ana | May 12, 2008 at 07:14 PM
I happen to think Ann has a pretty good idea of what the liberal media is really up to... I agree with her most of the time. She sure stirred up "The View" today. Regardless of what you think of her, you should check out this clip... it's freakin' hilarious!
http://www.ehow.com/how_4716118_see-ann-coulter-view.html
Posted by: Conservative Mama | January 12, 2009 at 05:43 PM