I can’t believe I’ve been writing in this blog long enough to have posted on three of my daughter’s birthdays, the day she turned 10, last year when she turned 11, and today, her 12th birthday. We had a fun pre-birthday celebration yesterday that included breakfast at the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel (site of the first Academy Awards), some birthday shopping, and later High Tea and a movie. In what has to be symbolic of that in-between age she now occupies, our shopping excursion included picking out a stuffed animal at Build-a-Bear followed by a visit to Victoria’s Secret. Oy. They should give special psychological training to the Victoria’s Secret employees on how to deal with the deer-in-the-headlights fathers who are dragged into the store by their rapidly changing pre-teens. I usually veto any suggestive phrases on my daughter’s clothing but when we got home I saw that we had purchased one set of underwear with “Oh La La!” written across the butt. Oh well, it’s not like anyone’s going to see it…I hope. (Note to 12-year-old girls who are are experiencing the wonders of prepubescence: if you do drag your father into an underwear store, you might want to ask him not to blog about it!)
Twelve is definitely a major turning point in the lives of children. I remember that on my 12th birthday an Alaska Airlines jet crashed into a mountain outside of Juneau, killing all 111 people on board. Such tragedies seemed extremely rare back then and I recall wondering what it boded for my upcoming year. (12-year-olds are nothing if not self-centered. Yes, over a hundred people died but what about ME?!) I’m confident that Leah will have many more wonderful memories of being 12 than I do. My 12th year was marked by the continuing war between my parents (they had gotten divorced in early 1971 but the fun was far from over), the escalation of violence in Vietnam, and the Watergate break-in. Okay, there were probably good things that happened that year, too, but they don’t immediately come to mind.
Leah is in far better emotional shape than I was back then although this time of life brings with it a fair amount of crazy mood swings and boundary testing no matter how well balanced you are. As a parent, it is exciting and awe-inspiring to watch my daughter mature into such a wonderful and caring young woman, even as I simultaneously grieve the child that is no more.
Happy Birthday to one of the most loving, creative, interesting, and talented people I know.
Take a bow, Leah!
Twelve! A big celebration indeed. I am like a deer in headlights when I walk into Victoria Secrets too, Danny!
Happy Birthday, Leah!
Posted by: tamarika | December 28, 2006 at 10:13 AM
Happy birthday, Leah. Make sure your family treats you like royalty today.
Posted by: Neil | December 28, 2006 at 01:02 PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEAH!! You're the greatest niece ever.
oy-i can't believe you're 12!! How could that be when I"M 12??!!
Love,
aunt susie
Posted by: your aunt | December 28, 2006 at 06:57 PM
I have heard that 12 is a major turning point for girls, but I wouldn't know having three boys! All I know is that my oldest just turned 23 yesterday, and I look at him and think wow I was already married when I was 23, but I'm not ready for him to move out yet, let alone get married!!! Enjoy her while she is still this age, it goes by really fast!!!
Posted by: Arlene (Silverman) Andresen | December 28, 2006 at 08:19 PM
Not to scare you or anything, but 12 is a piece of cake compared to 13. The hormones just on a comin'.
Posted by: Churlita | December 29, 2006 at 11:11 AM
Happy birthday to a very talented young lady!
Posted by: Rurality | December 29, 2006 at 01:08 PM
My son is 11, and I so relate to your line about being proud of who (s)he is becoming while grieving the child that is being left behind.
Posted by: V-Grrrl | December 29, 2006 at 01:11 PM
What a touching birthday tribute from father to daughter ... I have one daughter who passed that milestone 7 years ago and another who will be approaching it in less than 2 years. All ages and stages bring their own joy and beauty (and tribulations!) for parent and child. Here's to appreciating each step.
Many happy birthday wishes to Leah.
And best wishes to her dad,
JP
Posted by: JanePoe (aka Deborah) | December 29, 2006 at 07:13 PM
Happy Birthday Leah!
You have already received the best gift a girl your age can get: two parents who love each other and who could "look at you forever." (My favorite line from Sondheim's "Sunday in the Park With George.")
Much love,
Elaine
Posted by: Elaine Soloway | December 30, 2006 at 05:28 AM
Happy Birthday Leah. From everything your dad says about you, I have no doubt that spending a day with you would be a blast! Danny, the kind of father you are, continues to amaze me.
Posted by: cruisin-mom | December 30, 2006 at 08:17 PM
Leah, mazel tov on turning 12. What an age--on the threshhold of teenhood, yet a child underneath it all. Just the perfect composition to make your parents crazy...for a few years!
Your pre-celebration activities sounded like tons of fun and I hope that fun continues throughout the year for you.
You might want to seek out this YA book; it might offer up some great wisdom for twelve-year-olds!
http://www.amazon.com/You-Are-Not-Invited-Mitzvah/dp/0786856165/ref=si3_rdr_bb_product/002-3210943-9767221
Posted by: Pearl | December 30, 2006 at 09:36 PM
The photographer Sally Mann has an insightful book called "At Twelve" -- photos of girls at that threshold age, revealing the tremendous variations in maturity among them. Then there's the movie "Thirteen," which, if you haven't seen it, you can start worrying about a year in advance.
My 11-1/2 year old son is already showing strong symptoms of adolescence. Friendly ones, though.
Posted by: Richard Lawrence Cohen | January 01, 2007 at 07:31 PM
Shopping at Victoria's Secret with your daughter? You are a brave man (and I am very glad I have a son.)
Posted by: deezee | January 02, 2007 at 02:04 PM
Happy Birthday, Leah!
Sounds like you're well on your way to a great life.
Posted by: Melinda | January 03, 2007 at 08:38 AM