Believe it or not, this is a photo of the two embryos that are growing in Kendall’s uterus as we speak. (Did I ever dream I’d be mentioning Kendall’s uterus in a blog post?) We had a scare earlier this week when none of the seven eggs that were retrieved had fertilized but it turned out that like Kendall herself, they just wanted to rest for a day or two before beginning the arduous process of multiplying and possibly turning into a human being. Of the three that eventually started growing, two made it to this morning and they are now safely back home where they belong. The embryologist cheerfully told us the quality distinctions between the different embryos. One of ours is an A, which is the highest quality, one is a B, which is a little abnormal (but can still produce a completely healthy baby), and the other one was a D which stands for dead as a doornail. I’m rooting for the B embryo, I always feel sorry for the underdog. Besides, I think it’s sorta cute with all those random cells going every which way. The A embryo looks a little too organized to comfortably live with us. Just kidding, A, we’ll be thrilled if you decide to go the distance. Is it wrong that we named the embryos Big Edie and Little Edie after Jackie Kennedy’s crazy aunt and cousin from “Grey Gardens?” I think it’s a pretty good photo considering the embryos are still microscopic at this point. As they were doing another ultrasound on Kendall today, I kept wondering why those images are still as gray and fuzzy as an old kinescope of “The Milton Berle Show.” Shouldn’t they be in HDTV widescreen color by now?
This whole process is mind-blowing and I can see why there are so many fertility blogs out there, but don’t worry, I’m not about to turn this into one. I probably won’t mention Big or Little Edie again until they make their intentions known. We are hopeful but realistic about our chances. I remember that awful line from “Terms of Endearment” when the doctor said to Shirley MacLaine, “I always tell my patients to hope for the best but plan for the worst,” at which point MacLaine gives a pitch-perfect reading of the line, “And they let you get away with that?!” For now, Kendall has to stay in bed for three days and then take it easy for two weeks. She’s in heaven. Who wouldn’t welcome doctor’s orders to watch as much bad TV as you want and get three meals a day in bed? But it’s not all fun and games—I just shoved a three-inch needle into Kendall’s butt for her nightly shot of progesterone. I honestly thought I wouldn’t be able to give her those shots but I don’t mind a bit. Shall I change my name to Nurse Ratched?
I just realized that we haven’t yet told some of our closest family and friends that we’re doing this and here I am writing about it on my blog. You won’t breathe a word of it, will you?
This is the first time I'm rendered speechless by a post. What is the proper thing to say in this situation -- "Good luck?" I need to check my Modern Emily Post.
Posted by: Neil | October 18, 2006 at 11:39 PM
I'm rooting for all of you.
Love,
Posted by: Elaine Soloway | October 19, 2006 at 03:07 AM
That's pretty intense, Danny. Best of luck to you, Kendall, A, & B.
Posted by: Heather | October 19, 2006 at 05:39 AM
Danny,
Am completely grateful that you share this with us. What an amazing journey you two are on! While I wait to hear what Neil's etiquette research comes up with, I will be holding you all in my thoughts.
Posted by: tamarika | October 19, 2006 at 06:01 AM
Gosh, first day in the petri dish and they're already under the uncomfortable microscope of quality assurance professionals. TQM has gone too far. Glad to hear they meet FDA standards and are fit to be little Millers. My message to them--hang in there. Literally!
Posted by: V-Grrrl | October 19, 2006 at 07:08 AM
Awwww, could my potential neice/nieces and/or nephew/nephews
be any cuter???
Love,
your sister
Posted by: your sister | October 19, 2006 at 07:10 AM
Amazing stuff, Danny. Wishing you and Kendall, and A & B the best of luck.
Posted by: Elisabeth | October 19, 2006 at 08:17 AM
But they could both make it, too -- right?
And would your readers thereby have earned the right to call them Big Edie and Little Edie, regardless of their actual names (or genders)?
Congrats!
David
Posted by: david | October 19, 2006 at 10:13 AM
Oh,there are much worse names you could have given them, lol.
Congrats, crossing fingers. :)
~S
Posted by: Shephard | October 19, 2006 at 11:37 AM
OMG Danny, so excited for you and Kendall...keeping everything crossed!!!
Posted by: Wendy | October 19, 2006 at 08:41 PM
Wishing you and Kendall, and A and B well Danny.
Posted by: cruisin-mom | October 20, 2006 at 07:25 AM
Danny, wishing you and Kendall much luck in the days, weeks, and months ahead. I hope that you will be blessed...
Posted by: Pearl | October 20, 2006 at 10:17 AM
Fingers crossed. B seems to be more my type, too, but I'm hoping they both make it, and I will adore both equally, if they do. I can't imagine anything would be much funnier than any posts you might write about raising twins.
Posted by: Emily | October 20, 2006 at 12:00 PM
I've got all my fingers and toes crossed for you guys. I've been there. My twins are IVF babies and the wait is really intense. I'm rooting for both embies but I'm inclined to love B a tad bit more. Both of my kids were B types, and they've continues to be a bit "off" ever since. It's the way I like 'em.
Posted by: margalit | October 20, 2006 at 01:51 PM
I just wanted to say how touched I am by these comments and good thoughts and wishes. They have made me so happy to read and I am sure are very encouraging to little A and B to take up residence! Surely, indeed, nothing could be more tempting to stay than the thought that all their future escapades will be so delightfully documented by their insane father. He has already made every step of the long strange trip of fertility into a memorable one. When I think of all the adventures, laughs, crying jags, despair and ridiculous situations we've had in these fourteen months... maybe these are just all the hormones talking... but I wouldn't have missed a minute. And hormones or no, I wouldn't be saying that if it had been anyone but Mr. Privacy Room himself by my side. Come on, A and B, you'll both be riddled with more mental problems than we can ever afford to get fixed, but what a time we'll have!
Posted by: A and B and Me | October 20, 2006 at 05:52 PM
Neil (Citizen of the Month) directed me over here....I have a post up now about how I wish I hadn't openly discussed the fact that my husband and I are trying to get pregnant. Wishing you and your wife all the best.
Posted by: Jessica | October 20, 2006 at 08:26 PM
Wow, I have to tell you I was very moved by this post. I don't know you or Kendall, or even Big or Little Edie, but this post was wonderful.
If either, or both makes it, they're going to be very lucky to come into your family!
Posted by: Dave | October 21, 2006 at 01:35 AM
I am totally rooting for all of you.
When Michael and I come down to L.A. in two weeks, I hope we can be celebrating good news with you.
Much love!
Posted by: Laurie | October 21, 2006 at 10:26 PM
Wow. That is an absolutely amazing photo. Good luck to you!
Posted by: Dr Judy | October 21, 2006 at 11:58 PM
I'm keepimg my fingers and toes and arms and legs and eyes CROSSED! Tell Kendall if she wasn't already Hooked on "Project Runway" to watch the whole thing as I am sure they are repeating it constantly! It is quite wonderful and there's a whole entire day of bedrest TV right there!
Posted by: OldOldLady Of The Hills | October 22, 2006 at 09:52 AM
Sending good thoughts from Texas! Wonderful news!
Posted by: nappy40 | October 22, 2006 at 01:18 PM
Blessings to you both, and to A and B. They'll get such a kick out of it in the future when you show them their first online photos!
Posted by: Richard Lawrence Cohen | October 23, 2006 at 11:39 AM
I will keep all of you in my thoughts and prayers. I've been on the journey successfully and wish you every happiness. If you want, I will put Kendall on the Meshabarch list for extra congregational support.
Posted by: Kat | October 24, 2006 at 08:26 AM
Well now I feel fully up to date with the whole situation. Can tell this blog will keep me feeling close-- as if we still lived on Oak Stret and were looking forward to another night of Pictionary.
I send all my love and light. Go, A and B, Go!
We love you all-- big and small.
xxo
Posted by: lex | October 24, 2006 at 12:35 PM
Wow! How exciting. I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed for all of you. ("A and B and Me" sounds like a great book title, by the way!)
Posted by: Rurality | October 25, 2006 at 09:04 PM
What an awesome photo. I am so excited for you all!
Posted by: Julie Voss | October 26, 2006 at 12:24 PM
Wow, Danny! I've been so entrenched in my schedule that I hadn't checked your blog in a short bit...and what do I see? Sparks of life! Blessings to all of you. :)
Posted by: Adriana Bliss | October 27, 2006 at 02:09 PM
Mazel Tov! We are so excited for you and Kendall. Happy, Happy, Happy!
Posted by: Alan and Sheila | October 28, 2006 at 07:01 PM
Danny, I don't know if you remember me, but we met at Naomi's B'day party. I sometimes read your blog and love it. But this is a very special time for you and Kendall. I pray it all goes well. I'm very excited for you. My take on it for Kendall is to enjoy, savour and cherish this experience...it's all so amazing and incredible. Congratulations!
~Audrey Franks
Posted by: Audrey Franks | October 29, 2006 at 12:21 AM
Blessing to you both from China.
Congratulations!
Posted by: Hui | October 30, 2006 at 08:23 AM
Oh, how wonderful. Let's go A & B!!! Rock the house!
Posted by: Vicki Forman | October 30, 2006 at 01:05 PM